Trump Claims “You’re So Vain” About Him

Washington, DC - Defying years of precedent and established knowledge, President Trump claims that Carly Simon’s classic song “You’re So Vain” is actually about him and not Warren Beatty, as was previously believed.

Biden and both Warrens dispute this new claim. Sanders, Buttigieg, and Simon have no comment.

Trump watches himself Gavotte

Press Release from Heidegger’s Hologram, Assistant to the White House Press Secretary, Department of Liberal Outreach